Episode 10: All Bullshit!

In episode 10 of '' The Conversion Hacker Podcast '' Germany's top conversion hacker Jörg Dennis Krüger tells you why the word '' bullshit '' has become one of his favorite expressions.

A special thank you goes out to Lennart Wollmershäuser, who gave the great intro for this special episode.


My name is Jörg Dennis Krüger and as my cheerleader at the reception has just said: Yes, I am the conversion hacker! And I'm totally happy about this episode, because this is episode no.10 of the conversion hacking podcast and you heard that my cheerleader was someone else today, because today I really put someone up front who made me right cheers and really motivates me to deliver a cool episode 10 here. 

And this is the bullshit episode. Bullshit is one of my favorite words anyway and bullshit is what I hear from so many online marketing departments. What I hear from so many shop owners. What I actually have to listen to every day, where I now also say that when I hear bullshit I don't feel like working with companies. And a bit like that, this episode will be the summary of the bullshit of the past 12 weeks, since JDK Krüger has been a company since then. So my new company, where we have already advised an incredible number of shop owners and talked even more and the best things always come. 

Let's start with the latest bullshit - namely with the statement: "Yes yes, I already have someone for SEO!" And then I open Sistrix and see a Sistrix Score, Visibility Index of 0,06. Where I say: the hack?! You already have someone for Seo, well okay, throw him out! So 0,06 visibility for an online shop, what's that supposed to mean? I mean, my weird puny B2B site might do that, but a B2C online shop, in this case it's about pet items and he's like, “yeah yeah we've just started and so on a bit crashed because we're on the new shop software have moved. That's normal when moving for new shops, so you crash a bit." No it isn't. That's bullshit, that's just shit done. “Yes, something was broken there”, yes, yes, yes, yes exactly, because you don't know how to do it, stop it! Done, we'll never be able to work together. This is just bullshit. We don't need to talk about it any further.

This: "I know everything better anyway" is what I see with some shop owners, preferably online marketing managers, managers of performance marketing, who just think they know everything and if someone comes up with any suggestion, they come next bullshit point: “Yeah, I know anyway, I've already got it on the list. That's yes anyway, you don't need to talk about it, I already know all that, I've got it all here on my plan. That's all, everything is already planned, we'll implement everything soon." 

Yes hey dude, if you don't prioritize, if you only write losses, then the best thing is not even to know how to implement it and you don't even want to hear from me how to implement it, but just know that you are going to change something have to, yes ey, then leave it. Because exactly this spirit doesn't work either. Now easy to know: “Yes, yes, customer reviews are very, very important, I know, we have to display better, yes, yes - next topic.” Yes no, of course, you know that you have to show them better, but that's better. It's just a huge huge area. What do you know what is better? Yes, you have a thousand ideas, kind of read 10.000 blog posts and stuff like that and now you think you are the expert, but no, it’s not. 

It's just really super annoying and then this comes up on a lot of topics: "Yes, yes, yes, yes, I know that I have to do it". SEO is a classic topic, magazine: "Yes, yes that doesn't convert, we still have to add a call to action." – “Oh yes, the filters, yes we already have that on the list that we will make the filters better”. And customer reviews, I just said that's kind of a favorite topic. Then the basics are totally neglected and when you look into the shop and think yes, you've somehow implemented totally funny things, you're somehow doing personalization and stuff like that, but you've done away with all the basics. Next topic USPs: "Yes, yes, it says on the page which USPs we have!" Where? I do not see it. "Yeah look there". Ah, right at the bottom is your right of return, at the bottom there are other customer reviews, at the bottom is why you are actually a shop, you are a great shop and actually that is not even at the bottom, because there is something about maybe USPs, but what is actually there it's just bullshit, it's just run-of-the-mill stuff. It doesn't say what really distinguishes your shop, it just says free returns, fast shipping, a thousand payment methods, secure processing.

Yes, what the hack? That's not a USP. Just think about how something like this works. Well, I have a questionnaire that I beat all the customers through so that they really give it some thought, eight points long. What is relevant for our customers? What are our customers? What do they think is great? What are they complaining about? Which products do I want to sell, which ones do I perhaps not want to sell in this way? And so. And you just have to say, you have to really think about it and not come up with these bullshit arguments like: "Yes, yes, yes, it's on the side." So users will not A) search the whole site and B) think outside the box. It's also such a bullshit thing that it seems to me more and more as if a lot of online shops are more like guessing games. 

It starts with icons, I talked about that in a previous episode, that you somehow build icons that are more like picture puzzles. But also otherwise that the really important things are all hidden. I have to click through half the shop to get to the right products, the filters are either completely hidden or so huge that you can no longer see the products, so that the customer is more on a scavenger hunt than on the way to shop And then I always say thoughtfully: How about how things are in Lidl or Aldi or, in the worst case, in Rewe, although Rewe is a bit pretentious and stuff like that, but the customers are taken by the hand and the shops are structured relatively uniformly . That means the customer just walks through, he finds everything while walking through there and so on. This isn't a scavenger hunt. Quite often in online shops. Then there are these bullshit arguments, like: "Yes, we thought about it that way, so that the customer would see the whole range." 

Yes why? Why does the customer have to see the entire range? Yes, you can do that somehow, a bit, but then not so explicitly, a bit implicitly to guide the customer. But the customer does not have to see the entire range, the customer has to find what he was looking for and buy it. Of course, if the customer comes to the shop for inspiration, because he may have googled for a general keyword, for the keyword “gifts” or something like that, then I should send him a few more ads, but I don’t send him on a scavenger hunt there either for gifts, but I try to guide him as well as possible, to take him by the hand. And then all of a sudden it's implemented very explicitly, then all of a sudden it's like: “Oh, we have to ask them! So we have to ask them, what exactly do they need, how do we get them to tell us exactly what they want?"

Moment, moment, moment, moment: lead! Leading is not pulling the collar through the arena. Leading is about finding out, preferably implicitly, what the customer wants and taking them by the hand and showing them how to go about it. Trying to beat customers out of what they want to see won't work either, because they probably don't even know it. And there's so many bullshit arguments in the minds of so many people, it's really annoying. And honestly; who now finds himself in these arguments and who says: "Ah, Krüger says that's bullshit, but no no, that's exactly right!" If you find yourself there and you find what I call bullshit you think is right, then please do me a favor: turn off this podcast 30 seconds before the end of the episode and please do so for each episode, because I don't want to that you ask me for an appointment. I don't want to discuss this. I would like to talk to shop owners, I only support shop owners who really want to change something, who want to break out of these arguments.

Those who don't have this bullshit idea in their head, but who really want to ensure that their shop becomes more successful and sometimes think in other directions than they have previously been in their heads. Because only then does it work, only then can you surprise users, only then can you make the user really, really happy with a shop if you simply get rid of all these things that have been on your mind up to now. Because this opinion that you have of your products, your shop, your customers and so on, influences how you design your shop. And if you don't break with this opinion, then you won't be able to sell either. 

I just spoke to a shop owner who was not at all enthusiastic about one of his products that he received. He was so unenthusiastic about the product that he didn't even list it in the shop and that's why he didn't sell it. You would have said: "Oh, look, that's a great product, list it." The bullshit shop operator would have said: "No, that's stupid, I know that. I'm the expert, what my customers like and I've been doing it forever and I don't put that in my shop, that sucks." However, the shop operator was clever, the shop operator took a closer look at the product, was then inspired to put the product in his shop and sold it. Is now his third best selling product in his shop, I think. he just told me 

And that's when you realize when you question your own opinion, when you allow other opinions and if you're not caught in that kind of bullshit cycle, then you can really be successful. And then we are back at the big American department store, they simply test everything, they say something has to go wrong sometimes. Eight out of ten ideas will not work. Of course, you have to be able to afford it, or these ideas have to be small enough for a smaller online shop so that something can go wrong. But only then can I really develop and break out of this bullshit cycle and really grow, because the main reason why many shops just tend to stagnate and have rather low growth rates is because they always do the same thing and then maybe hope to generate more traffic to somehow grow from it, but it's getting more and more expensive and so on. And if you always do the same thing, then simply not that much will change. So: have courage, less bullshit, change, grow, sell! That works.

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